I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Randomize
