is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
