Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
