You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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