On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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