He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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