I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
