At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Too much gin, very little bucket
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
