Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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