I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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