Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize