have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I could make wine with my vomit
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
