I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
