If i come over, it means nothing
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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