last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
