what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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