This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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