You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
