Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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