i don't like sucking hair
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
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