yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
