We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
it was like eating out sand paper
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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