im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
