just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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