my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
