I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
