Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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