So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
