whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
she pinky promised me she was 18
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
