they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
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