Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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