We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
