how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
