i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize