Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
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