grandma shit on top of the toilet
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
