Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
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