lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... whoโs the real winner here
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
Randomize