Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize