That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
