One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
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