return my video game
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
