I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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