Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize