oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
