I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
But theres a keg here and me gusta
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
