his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
