My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
