i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Barsexuality is the new black.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
