and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
