So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
My feet surprised me
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