It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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